badblood44's Journal

Is there anybody........out there?
I don't think too many people see my liveJournal account, and perhaps I'll keep it that way. Some may by virtue of being on some friends list or via comments I've left in other journals. However, in the interests of keeping my blogspot space mainly about poker, I'll pop an entry here and there on occasion when the situation warrants it.

Today, the situation warrants it.

I'm very tired. I'm tired of doing the same things over and over, solving the same problems over and over that others have left behind in their wake. On days like today, I strongly resist the urge to forego my workout and tie on one of the greatest benders my life has seen. Each time thoughts like this crop up, the sensible side of me, the side who knows he's a husband and a father, wins the battle and I hit the gym. The beast is repressed yet again.

But he grows stronger.

And the sensible side of me is finding it more difficult to win the daily battles.

So as I listen to my iPod and struggle through the waning minutes of my workday, I believe I have won the battle yet again. I fear the day I lose.

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